No-Go’s

Hi:

This is the stage where life really does slow down. It would ideally be for most in the late 80’s and 90’s, at this point, some assisted living is required. Footing is unsteady so help bathing is appreciated.

Cooking can become a chore and unless there is some other intervention, often becomes sandwiches and tea, or other easy-to-prepare meals.

At this age few are still out there mowing their lawns and doing major physical activities. Many have moved to condominiums or to congregate care.

In congregate care facilities people may rent or buy a one or two bedroom suite. Upscale facilities have elegant dining rooms with a chef cooking three meals a day. If you own, included in maintenance fees are usually a number of dinners a month.

Others prefer a package which includes all meals, house cleaning, laundry and some social activities. This is not inexpensive, as the costs can go up to $3,000 to $5,000 a month. It works for many though, as they retain their independence and can just enjoy life.

The concept of “aging-in-place” deserves some consideration. The premise is that it becomes difficult to move as you become elderly. Your lack of familiarity with where you live and where things are can be problematic, especially for those with short-term memory loss.

The solution to this problem is to help parents move to a facility that has several levels of care. This should be done when they are still mentally active and capable. At this point they will identify with their new home and establish connections.

If, a few years later, their health starts to fail, more assistance can be organized. Of course this costs. For example, one care aide might be shared by four people. She (usually) would help people get dressed in the morning, help with bathing, ensure the proper medications were taken, and generally assist. This is a great help because the care aide has daily contact and is aware of the individual’s status.

The level of care can be monitored and increased without the upheaval of a move. In my opinion it is a reasonable option to consider.